By Josh Gondelman — 15 Sep 2025

#149. A Lonely Skeleton and You

Many bones about it, it's weird to see a street with one large skeleton already up!

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Hi everyone,

In my friend Dan Perlman's new short film "Being Bublé" (the story of how Dan was hired to perform as a Michael Bublé impersonator at a private party despite not looking anything like Michael Bublé and also not being a great singer, no offense), there is a perfect moment that has stuck with me since I saw it. Dan is standing inside Manhattan's fancy Nordic restaurant (???) Aquavit in a suit, signing headshots of the famous Canadian crooner and handing them out to partygoers. The last attendee in line walks away, and Dan holds the headshot up near his own actual head. They look, again, not at all alike.

"Nothing means anything," he says, looking directly to camera.

In this particular context, Dan is referring to the fact that people see what they want to see. He even improbably managed to convince a few tipsy elder Gen Xers that he was the real deal rather than a Fauxblé because they wanted so badly to believe.

But also "nothing means anything" is such a broadly applicable statement these days. It could refer to say, a lack of consensus around how to process the fact that the unmitigated ongoing tragedy of American gun violence took the life of one of America's most openly racist and transphobic people. But closer to home, "nothing means anything" is exactly how many people I know feel about their careers. My buddy Alison Leiby wrote about this for her newsletter last week. Dan wrote about it in his newsletter as well. Even sitting in the audience waiting for the short film program to start on Tuesday night, a friend and I used those exact words to explain the feeling of the industry and (to a lesser extent) the world lately.

It makes sense that a vibe of light existential despair permeated the air at Dan Fest (an exhibition of three short films Perlman made over the past year). It's part of the impulse that brought the evening into being. When he wasn't creating and starring in the Showtime series Flatbush Misdemeanors, Dan got itchy to make something, so he made something. A trio of things! The two non-Bublé shorts, filmed five years apart from one another, were really funny and touching and starred the same pair of child actors. Nobody was asking for these films (again, no offense), but Dan made them anyway. And they rule. Dan just telling me the Bublé story out loud in person was one of my favorite entertainment experiences of the past ten years. You've got to see the film when he puts it out.

The kind of stuff I'm into lately is the kind of thing nobody wants. Not unpopular things necessarily, but personal passion projects. I read a ton of newsletters because I like to see what people write when they're not constrained by the structures of a bigger media institution (and also because these institutions seem to dwindle in number month by month). On Friday night, my friend China told me that her new album isn't going to be on any streaming services. She wants people to come see her shows and connect with the music on her terms THEN pick up a physical record. (More on this later.) I think that's great! Encourage to people meet you where you are instead of rushing to get in the back of the line where everyone else already is. (Easier said than done, and possibly easier typed than said.)

I spent a lot of last week enjoying and celebrating friends' and colleagues' weird and/or specific projects. On top of Dan Fest, I went to Defector's fifth birthday party and saw Avery Friedman and Speedy Ortiz play music. Defector is a true beacon for people looking to create functional, independent media (it's worker-owned, if you don't know)! I read (this piece, speaking of Defector) at Jessica Defino and Emily Kirkpatrick's book club kickoff, which was packed with their fans. I celebrated the launch of my buddy Jason Diamond's new Jewish/Chicago/crime novel Kaplan's Plot next door at Superiority Burger and FUCKING MARTHA STEWART WALKED IN FOR A DRINK AND TOOK A PICTURE WITH JASON.

Jason Diamond, friend and author, beside Martha Stewart, famous star and documentary subject. — This is BANANAS, right???

On Thursday night (the 11th), I saw my friends Charly Bliss absolutely rip a show on a boat that cruised up and down the East and Hudson rivers around Manhattan. I ran into a bunch of friends on the boat, which was really lovely and gave me this beautiful sense of artistic community. The show itself was a so good. Charly Bliss writes perfect songs. It was weird to cruise right by the Statue of Liberty and the 9/11 memorial lights on the 24th anniversary of 9/11. It was a fascinating coincidence that I will always remember (the nice inverse of "never forget").

On Thursday night, I was inadvertently patriotic.

I also saw PUP and Jeff Rosenstock and Ekko Astral at the Paramount in Brooklyn on Saturday because my show in Connecticut got postponed (sorry, people of Fairfield!). I'm going to see them again tonight in Boston (sorry, people of Frankenstein's Baby!). Saturday's show was great to the point that I felt emotionally overwhelmed. I know PUP generally rejects encores as a rule, but they did an encore-ISH thing with both headliners on stage at once and kept making the audience chant "DOUBLE BAND! DOUBLE BAND!" until they brought out Ekko as well and everyone chanted "TRIPLE BAND!" Perfect bit. I will not tell you what song Triple Band covered, but I will tell you it is an all time shout-along song for people age...35-50, let's say. I ran into a TON of friends and kept hugging them in a way that for SURE made me seem drunker than I was. These things happen (to me...because of me). I also ran into a bunch of super kind strangers! Thanks so much for saying hi, nice people I hadn't met before!

All three bands on the bill are really outspoken about their politics in a beautiful way. There was a lot of talk about empathy and liberation from the stage. Ekko put on the Liberation Weekend festival earlier this year to benefit trans rights organizations. All three acts played with a transgender pride flag behind them. These groups' success playing these big wonderful venues is a testament to doing things according to their own vision.

Lately it seems like what the decision makers with money want is music made for people to not listen to and podcasts created by nobody. Fuck that shit. Make singular, impractical work that comes from a human place. Connect with other people. Why else do we do this?

Anyway, Leiby and I are pitching a tv show this week and next week, and we're really proud of the work we've done so far. Nobody's asking for it, but we did it anyway. Maybe it'll become something. Maybe it won't. Either way, we'll do something else afterwards. Nothing means anything, so why not do something that means something to you, you know? A week ago, a guy on the subway told me that he liked my sneakers. No one can take that away from me.

(Also thanks to the Normal Gossip folks for having me along for their show at the Wilbur Theater in Boston last night. It's always a pleasure to come home for a show, and even more excellent when it's such a fun show with such brilliant collaborators and their legion of devoted fans. And double also, congratulations to all the cool and talented friends and strangers who won Emmys last night!!!)

SPEAKING OF WEIRD LITTLE PROJECTS...

Aimee Mann and Ted Leo's Christmas Show is BACK! I was lucky enough to be asked to tag along and do some bits for these shows the last few years, and I'm back for the 2025 tour. We're doing fifteen shows in eleven cities over seventeen nights. This is one of my great professional joys to be involved with. Aimee and Ted are two of the all time great songwriters and songperformers and are very funny on top of that (unfair)! Paul F. Tompkins is maybe the funniest person on earth? Nellie McKay is brilliant and has a truly unbelievable singing voice. And I get to travel with them (and Aimee's excellent band) and fuck around for three weeks? A dream!

It's a true variety show, so I don't do much standup, but I'll be popping up in various bits throughout the night. If you've been before, you know how silly and delightful these shows are. I'd love to see you there!

(And remember, I'm also going to be headlining standup shows in New Orleans and Minneapolis this fall! More to come, probably! Details below.)

PEP TALK FOR THE LONE HALLOWEEN DECORATION ALREADY UP IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD

Last weekend I received a question about whether it's still too early to put out a big Halloween skeleton on your lawn. I briefly replied that it was not. My soft rule for this is that you can start with Halloween decorations as soon as Labor Day has passed. Once people stop wearing white pants, it's less of a liability for them to poop said pants from fright. Not my actual rationale, but possibly a helpful device for remembering the guidelines.

A day or two later, I noticed that along a route I often walk with Maggie the Pug, a family (or a single enthusiast) had put up a mid-sized skeleton in front of their building. To date, it's the only house on my pug walking route with decorations up (except for the one witch that hangs outside an apartment over a nearby bar all year round in what seems like an oversight). Last week's temperatures hit the high 70s several times. And yet: Skeleton.

And to this skeleton and the people responsible for it I say...bravo. Putting up skeleton decorations while it is still technically and meteorologically summer really says something about you. And that thing is: I love bones, and I want them in front of my home for as much of the year as possible.

If you value bones that much, why wouldn't you put them on display? They bring a little whimsy to the neighborhood. And there are only so many days where they're especially inappropriate. (Memorial Day and 9/11 come to mind as instances when employing skeletons for mirth might come off as a little glib.) All the other days, why not? Life is short. We only get to celebrate so many occasions. But we can suck a little more marrow from our days if we try. Yeah, it's the middle of September. So what? Kids are back in school. The evening breeze arrives with a pleasant briskness. Leaves have begun to vacate their posts on tree branches. It'll be properly fall soon. Halloween decor will emerge bit by bit as the days pass (and then disappear basically all at once).

Until then, skeleton, you will remain avant-garde, a visionary, quite literally ahead of your time. Your presence speaks to a deep well of optimism. You are a harbinger of joy. Better times are ahead, but there's no reason to wait for time to pass so you can live the life you want to. Tomorrow isn't promised. Do it now.

Carpal diem. Fuck it, we ball (and socket joint).

PEP TALK FOR A READER

I've made minimal edits to this request! Here it is!

I have to make a doctor's appointment to get a prescription renewed. Because I live in Quebec, this involves calling a government hotline and arguing in French for about an hour before getting an appointment. Please encourage me to do this before I run out of repeats.
- Having a Health of a Time

The way I see it, you've got the choice between doing something annoying now, or doing the same thing in a way that is equally annoying but also way more stressful later. I wish I could say that I'm the kind of person who looks every problem in the eyes and swiftly head-butts it in the forehead before it–the problem–can get the drop on me. Roughly half the time, I am that guy. The rest of the time I'm like...I know this will be worse later, but what does that have to do with now? And then when Present Me and Future Me merge, they're both pretty pissed off at Me Of The Recent Past.

So I am here to tell you that not only CAN you solve this problem quickly and efficiently-ish, you SHOULD. This sounds like advice, but I don't think it's advice if you brought it up, and you didn't ask for alternative plans. "Hell yeah you've got this!" remains a pep talk and not a prescription, is my contention.

"But Josh, isn't it hypocritical of you to say they can achieve a goal that you yourself often fail to accomplish?" To steal a joke directly from Dave Attell: Shut up, voice in my head. "Why should you prevail upon someone to be better than you admit to being? Why don't you do it first?" To steal another Dave Attell line: Shut up, louder, scarier voice in my head!

The answer to that question is: Yes! I am a hypocrite! (It was either I accept "hypocrite" or adopt on the much sadder "cautionary tale.") I do want to be more on top of certain things, but the fact is I'm not. Which mostly works out fine for me. But I wouldn't recommend it. Because here's the thing: Not everybody is cut out for this procrastination life.

I am excellent at procrastinating. It's a dubious brag, but a sincere one. It's not just putting off work until the last minute. It's not even mostly that. It's exactly the kind of logistical stuff you're dealing with. Medical appointments. Travel plans. I've gotten better at getting out in front of issues that involve other people, but when I'm on my own wow you cannot imagine how bad a planner I can be.

Have I booked a hotel for two nights in a city after I've already landed in that city? You know it. Did I eat dinner after eleven pm twice last week because Maris was out of town and I overscheduled myself earlier in the evening. Oh yeah. How did I feel about it? Amazing. Exhilarated. Alive. TikTok would diagnose me with ADHD because of this. But I just don't care that much about these things.

Here's my logic: If I don't make a plan, I'm not thinking about that plan. I don't need to concern myself with the future. It's called living in the moment, ever heard of it? If there's no plan, nothing can go wrong. Any hiccup is part of the loose no-plan lifestyle. But when you do make a plan, and it goes wrong...uh oh! Now you're in trouble! This happened to me recently, and the lesson I took from it was that it doesn't matter if you try hard. You can't just skip forward from when you make a decision to that decision coming to fruition. And again, the further in advance you devise a plan, the more time there is for the plan to fall through. Huge mistake, having foresight.

Does my way of doing things backfire? Oh yeah all the time. But that's fine. Because when you leave things to the last minute, only the last minute is a problem! It's foolproof. And buddy, I know because I am a fool.

That said, you should definitely call the government hotline and argue with them in French for an hour before the urgency makes your French arguing sound...extra...French? (Disappointed, condescending, etc. Just how it sounds when French people talk to me, an American dumbass.) You can get this done with as little strain as possible, and you'll feel happier and healthier for it.

You don't want to be like me. And even if you do, you're not on my level.

PICK-ME-UP SONG(S) OF THE WEEK:
China Moses - "it's complicated...(mise en bouche)"
(Album Preview)

I can't wait to hear China's whole album (as mentioned above, available only in physical form), but for now we can all enjoy this mix that Donwill (our DJ at Frankenstein's Baby) has put together to whet our collective appetite. Well...it worked!!! I love it! I am so excited to pick up a hard copy as soon as I can!